the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Sunday, June 12, 2005

Sunday is just Monday with a head start

I've had several inquiries as to my non-smoking status. Let it be known that I have been tempted often but have not succumbed to the demon leaf craving. But I'm still just a bit tender, emotionally, and I may not have been in the best mood today.

Perhaps a photo essay would be illuminating, or at very least, could pad this post so I don't have to do any meaningful writing.

I was a bit annoyed when I first woke up:

Even a fart joke would not break the grimace.

To be honest, there was a nice spot today when Jim showed me where the foxglove had bloomed:

How do they get their paws in there?

Then, on top of barely suppressed nicotine pangs, I started to get a migraine. This did not a thing to bust out my cheerful nature:

Bring the pain. Wait -- no, don't!

Then I ended up at the grocery store for a lot, lot, lot longer than I wanted to be there:

Please shoot me immediately.

Now, lest you think that I'm just one big ball of whining, head-throbbing withdrawal bitching, let me assure you that I am still the Sunniest Girl on the Block:

Here's your fuckin' daisies.

Then I went to the laundromat, which is always more fun than I can possibly relate here. I love it when a man with one, maybe two teeth makes it his business to oversee the folding of my intimate garments. Yeah, pal - when you can figure out how to keep your teeth in your mouth, then we can talk about my bras. Stand any closer and I'll taser the grease off your nutsack.

As I brought my washables into the 'mat, I was greeted by a sign:

Those damn seniors get all the breaks.

So, what the fuck is a "limint"? Is it lime + mint? Sounded pretty nasty, so I didn't waste my $2.00.

Then when I went to get detergent, I was stopped in my tracks by this:

Just my luck, it was baroque.

The most unsettling thing that happened to me in there today was the skeletal old man in the cowboy hat and wasted muscle t-shirt who wandered by and asked if "this" belonged to me. "This" might have been a horrible orange ankle sock, or "this" might have been one of those chicken-cutlet bra inserts. Either way, I denied ownership, as his haunting, sunken eyes searched my face for a sign of truth, hedging, or downright fibbery. I played it cool, Daddy-O, and Slim Chipley went on about his business elsewhere.

All in all, though, I'm still bitchy and annoyed:

This is the face Jim's had to look at alllllll day.

Photoshop has been an important part of my recovery today, but it is by no means the only part. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm goin' up to the corner store so I can tell some complete strangers to kiss my ass. It's my turn to be the neighborhood weirdo who hangs around the 7-Eleven and makes people nervous about usin' the ATM.

25 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Weetzie said...

Poor Bucky. Please hang in there tho! Quit that damn smoky habit! Go Bucky!

9:31 PM, June 12, 2005  
Blogger August95 said...

** Go Bucky Go ** Thank you for putting up a new post. That lower picture just freaked me out.

9:45 PM, June 12, 2005  
Blogger Maven said...

Have you gotten your blood pressure checked? I used to get hellacious migraines all the time, and only after I had my pressure checked and got on anti-hypertensive Rx, did the majority of the migraines abate. Sure I get a stray one here and there, severe to the point of vomiting, but those are fewer than they used to be.

I always find/found that taking cool showers, keeping myself hydrated and caffeinated, and in a semi-conscious state (read: perpetual nappage), helps to ease me through days when it's that intense.

I feel your pain.

9:45 PM, June 12, 2005  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Was Bill Clinton I just saw?

Bucky, next time you have one of these icky days...candy, lots of candy. Nerds and/or Red Hots. Yep.

10:26 PM, June 12, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Baroque - hahahahaha! I chuckled out loud and had to say so.

10:30 PM, June 12, 2005  
Blogger Susie said...

Baroque. You're so clever.
Yes, we seniors do get the good stuff.
I think you're cute in all your pix. One of the two wrinkles in my forehead is named, "Migraine."
Thank you for id'ing the foxglove. I know that's right. I've been calling it a hollyhock, which I think looks somewhat similar.
I hope your head feels good tomorrow. Shut up, Jim.

11:21 PM, June 12, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

that is such good news-about not giving into temptation. i really hope you feel better soon. i'm wishing you a pain free sleep

11:28 PM, June 12, 2005  
Blogger Deli mom said...

I got bad headaches when I quit smoking. It took about a week but they went away. Good luck.

12:15 AM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Opera Gal said...

it must be something about Michigan and laundromats - my SO thinks i'm JOKING when i tell him about the creepazoids who also want to "oversee the folding of my intimate garments".

i feel your pain, there on that one.
BIOS failure after power outage last night. it's fixed, but I am way unhappy today.

Handel. you said Handel...huh.huh.huh.

8:02 AM, June 13, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Just my luck, it was baroque"



Hope your head feels better today. My sympathies.

Oh, and I love foxglove.

9:01 AM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Squirl said...

Poor Bucky. I hope you're feeling better today. Laundromats suck! Love the layout of your post. We are still seeing your sense of humor, even though it might be even a tad darker than usual. :-)

9:08 AM, June 13, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good to see I'm not the only one who got moist when you said " was baroque."

You know what I find works really good for a migraine? A dark room, no one near you, a TV with access to hold 'Bewitched' episodes and a snack (four boxes of Dove ice cream bars, a large meat-lovers Pizza Hut pizza, Lays original potato chips, New Hampshire and gallons and gallons of anything with caffiene.

9:09 AM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger c said...

So very funny. Even in your migraine induced haze of pain, you can be seriously funny.

It's a gift.

10:49 AM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Kitty said...

Handel baroque - so dying over here :).

I forgot how fun it is to go to the actual laundromat. There is one in the basement of my building so I really don't ever go to any around here anymore. We still get the occasional bum checking the change machines for stray change and shaking the vending machines.

11:09 AM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Katy Barzedor said...

Okay, first I must confess:
The "baroque" joke was Jim's idea. I can only take credit for stealing it.

Okay, conscience clear (well, not), let's move on:

Weetzie - thanks for the cheers, I'll take all the help I can get now!

August95 - Shall I add you to the "really hates Photoshop liquify" list with Squirl and Jess?

Nugget - Nope, the blood pressure has always been fairly normal, even with the job I have (yeah, there's just a bit o' stress there). But nappage is always the best defense. I find unconsciousness works to my benefit in a lot of situations...

Mr. B - Red Hots are always a good choice. I used to like to put a whole box of 'em in my mouth because...well, because the other kids at school wouldn't do it, that's why.

HDL - a joke stolen from my hubby. I shall tell him you enjoy!

Susie - would you mind reminding Jim how cute I am in all my pix? Of course, if he hears it from you, he'll be extra interested...

blogaholic - thanks! I'm great once I'm asleep. I wish I could arrange more of that.

Double bagger - I wish the headaches would go away with the withdrawal, but unfortunately, the headaches were there long before I even started to smoke again.

Opera gal - you know I thought of you when I saw the "handel" sign in the laundromat. Hope the damage from your power failure isn't too annoying! And yes, creepy old men have no shame in the laundromat. My panties are magnets.

Danielle - Jim is really into the fact that I'm tryin' to photograph all the flowers in the yard as they come in this year. Anytime something new blooms, he comes and gets me for a photo shoot. And he should be proud - he grows that stuff with no help/interference from me!

Ah, Dazed, always glad to render you moist. And since when did your blog get so respectable lookin'?

Misfit - hmmmm, when they called me "gifted" I just thought it was their nice way of sayin' "Put Bucky on the short bus."

Kitty - What I hate is when the bums wanna check my panties for spare change.
Hey, buddy! I haven't charged change for that since I grew hair on it!

Squirl - oh, yeah, my sense of humor is rarely darker than it is right now. And lucky you, you get to be around me allllll weekend. I'm goin' to the doc for some bitch pills on Thursday.

1:04 PM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Katy Barzedor said...

That's weird, that my comment to Squirl is out of turn.

Hmmmmm. Must done some insertion of which I wasn't aware.

Huh huh huh.

1:05 PM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Bucky. Livin' on the candied edge of life.

1:25 PM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger SierraBella said...

"Even a fart joke would not break the grimace." Now that's one bad morning!
This posting could be the new reality version of the "Day In The Life Of..." series.

1:54 PM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Random and Odd said...

SO proud of you! SO proud.

You go get em at the ATM!!

2:22 PM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Torrie said...

I'm frightened.

3:35 PM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Katy Barzedor said...

Mr. B - it's like Beavis and Butthead said of the band Winger:
Beavis: "These guys live on the edge!"
Butthead: "Yeah, the edge of Wuss Cliff."

Sierrabella - this site is the most cheaply produced reality series in America today. Complete with fart jokes!

Kristine - if I feel really mean, I'll shake 'em down for their Marloboros and send 'em to you.

Torrie - there are things that are much more frightening about me than my withdrawal moods. Just be glad I don't post nudies here.

3:50 PM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger spoonleg said...

How do they get their paws in there... baroque... damn bucky, you're hilarious when you're grumpy!

3:53 PM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Candy said...

Ya know, I have heard sex is a really good way to get rid of migraines, and to keep yourself busy. Idle hands and all that.

But then, sex is usually my answer to everything.

But hey, call me if you want to try some "alternative medicine" heh.

Someday, that line has just GOT to work. I know it.

6:43 PM, June 13, 2005  
Blogger Katy Barzedor said...

Spoonie - you only think it's hilarious because you don't have to live with me. Jim, I'm thinkin' he's thinkin' I'm not so hilarious...

Jess - sounds like a much better treatment than the "give up cheese and chocolate and citrus and alcohol..." advice I was given.

7:49 AM, June 14, 2005  
Blogger SWSNBN said...

Can I go to the 7-11 with you? I wanna be the creepy person too.

2:03 PM, June 15, 2005  

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