the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Monday, September 08, 2008

Hugs, not drugs. I mean, unless there are some drugs lying around, then both would be cool.

I had one of those customers on Saturday. You know what I mean, don't you? The shoppers who make outrageous requests out of the blue and don't bat an eye? Well, Saturday I had one who demanded a hug from me before I could make the sale.

Can you imagine?

Of course, I did it. A girl's gotta keep her sales average up.

Oh, alright, it's not even a bit as sordid as that all sounds. Actually, the customer was Squirl, and she was kind enough to buy something from me while she was visiting (oh, and also gave me homemade pizza and beer after work). And the hugging was not coerced.

This afternoon, she stopped in for a minute to visit me about an hour before I was scheduled to clock out, and I told her that if she wanted, she could go let herself into my house and visit with the cats until I got there. I'm sure I probably hugged her somewhere during the exchange.

You have to understand, my sister and I share a strong family resemblance, to the point that we've been mistaken for twins many, many times since I was in my teens. Our voices are also similar, and our laughs are identical.

After she left, a young male co-worker sidled up to me and inquired, in all seriousness, "Is that your girlfriend?"

Son, we may be from the South, but we ain't from that far south.

That is all; the till is now closed for the day.

9 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Flying Mermaid said...

It's bad enough when muthafuckas think with their dicks, but doncha just love it when they actually SEE with that tiny little one eye?

1:18 AM, September 09, 2008  
Blogger Squirl said...

I can't believe he didn't see the resemblance. I think mermaid's right, he wasn't really looking.

7:57 AM, September 09, 2008  
Blogger I'm not here. said...

What kind of pizza and what kind of beer? :)

4:44 PM, September 09, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That happened to my little sister and I. We were walking through a fair and wanted to get one of those old west pictures done. I told the lady running the booth we wanted to get our pic done and she said, 'Sorry, we don't serve your type of customer.' I was all perplexed and unaware and said 'family'? It wasn't til I got down a couple booths I figured out she thought we were dating and not sisters.

Hope she lost a ton of money!

11:59 PM, September 09, 2008  
Blogger eclectic said...

Bwahahaha!! Sorry, I could see this happening if I showed up, because really, we don't really look like sisters. But Squirl?!?! HA! I hope you told him that when your girlfriend shows up, he'll know because she'll be the one you slap on the ass and give a big wet kiss.

2:43 PM, September 10, 2008  
Blogger chia said...


Squirl hugged me yesterday too.

And here I thought she wasn't much of a fan of unnecessary touching. I was scared that something was going to happen to me and she had some like subconscious premonition and I was like being all extra cautious or something thinking that the hug must signify that something horrible was going to happen.

I feel much better now knowing we're both fuct. :-P.


2:29 PM, September 12, 2008  
Blogger here today, gone tomorrow said...

Lucky! You got a hug from Squirl!

9:08 PM, September 12, 2008  
Blogger Bone Machine said...

I am considering getting a contact for the tiny eye.

6:51 PM, September 17, 2008  
Blogger Unknown said...

It must be neat to have Squirl as a sister.

And you’re so right, Bucky: you are not from that far south! You are from Louisville, which is in Kentucky, although some rural Kentuckians would like to say it isn’t since they consider everything about cities to be “evil.”

In my years as a social worker, I found much, much more incest south of Louisville than in Louisville. Plus, my ex-wife is a survivor of incest, as are her 3 sisters, and they are from Buffalo, New York!

3:24 AM, September 18, 2008  

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