the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Monday, June 12, 2006


Ever have one incident that just fucking sets you off for the day?

I had occasion to deposit a check at my bank today, and on the way back, I stopped for gas at a fairly busy intersection. It's a pretty, sunny day, I've got a new haircut that everyone is being super nice about, I'd just put enough money in the bank to take care of my should be a great day, right?

But as I was leaving the gas station, I had to wait a considerable amount of time for traffic to clear. When it finally did, I went to make a right out of the driveway, and out of fucking nowhere, some idiot fuck on a bicycle was nearly on top of my car and I avoided hitting him by inches, literally by fucking inches. He had cut across the street, well away from the intersection where he should have been crossing. I was so shocked and upset that I almost lost it right there, because you know if I'd hit that mongoloid motherfucker, somehow I would've been the one in all the trouble for it. I really couldn't decide whether I should cry or I if should turn the car around, jump out, and kick the living shit out of him. It wasn't a kid, either - it was an adult, probably some inbred fuck who doesn't have a license because of DUIs.

So, it's an hour later and I'm still totally agitated. And when I'm like this, everything that bothers me just starts to invite itself into my thoughts and builds me a wall of bullshit. I can't stop thinking about how much I'd like to pummel that fucker on the bike, or the fact that I have to face reality soon and look for a real job, or all the red tape I have to go through for changing my license plates and identification, and all the shit that still needs to be sorted out for my divorce. I'm angry and frustrated that a good friend of mine is having health problems and I'm powerless to help. And I'm feeling my age and then some today. When I get this upset, I become obsessed with my own mortality, and all the things I haven't accomplished yet, and all the awful things that could happen.

I think I need to drink a huge amount of tequila and curl up with Wobbles and his magic purr machine.

For Aunt Squirl

16 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Closet Metro said...

tequila and pussy always works for me.

6:53 PM, June 12, 2006  
Blogger Froggylady said...

ditto closet metro...

8:42 PM, June 12, 2006  
Blogger Squirl said...

His magic purr machine is some of da best medicine.

I had some guy on a bike come up on my blind side as I was getting ready to turn right at a stop sign once. In fact, I was driving that green car that used to belong to Michael and Susan. As I turned the corner, I heard a noise. I stopped the car and saw him on the ground. When I went back to see if he was okay, he just acted pissed and said he was fine. I know I had my turn signal on. Thank goodness he didn't get hurt. Yeah, they would've figured out a way that it was my fault. And I had really crappy day after that.

And you have plenty of life left. Just cuddle up with Mr. Wobbles and everything will be fine.

8:43 PM, June 12, 2006  
Blogger Candy said...

At least you dont have hair like my mom.

And her new car matching purse.

9:05 PM, June 12, 2006  
Blogger I'm not here. said...

Sorry you had to encounter a dickwad on a bike.
People like that make me appreciate my canine boys a little more every day.
*hugs to make it all better*

9:09 PM, June 12, 2006  
Blogger Deli mom said...

kitty and drink have gotten me through a lot of tough days after work

12:35 AM, June 13, 2006  
Blogger Effie said...

or you could go over to Poop and Boogies and revel in their happiness for the day and worry about all that other sh*& tomorrow, right? Cause after all, in the words of Scarlett O'Hara "tomorrow is anothah day"!

I would have been SO freaked out after that happened with the bike-guy! There's plenty of people who *have* to bike around town in Hamilton due to DUI's....freaks!

9:45 AM, June 13, 2006  
Blogger Susie said...


I will if you will :)

(Only half of closet metro's remedy has ever worked for me, but you might have better luck . . . )

11:25 AM, June 13, 2006  
Blogger Unknown said...

Oh man... I'm sorry you're having a crappy day, Bucky. You need ice cream for lunch... prailines and cream, perhaps? Two scoops. With Butterscotch topping. Sure, it won't solve all the world's problems, but it's totally yummy and might just maybe bring a smile to your face. :)

12:31 PM, June 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry you are having a bad day, but you look fab! Just look in the mirror, take a big swig and pet your, um, kitty.

12:46 PM, June 13, 2006  
Blogger Pissy Britches said...

It doesn't take much.
Same here.
Cheer up BUCKY!
Your new haircut fucking rocks..if I can just say that again.

2:37 PM, June 13, 2006  
Blogger Pioneer Woman said...

Hey. I don't appreciate the Mongoloid remark. I have a retarded brother and it's very disrespectful.

HA! Gotcha, didn't I? Just kidding. Well, I DO have a retarded brother but your word didn't bother me. I call him names all the time.

2:48 PM, June 13, 2006  
Blogger eclectic said...

Eeep! Cyclists have no excuse for playing loose with traffic rules -- we are the ones who will likely get injured if there's an accident afterall. Doesn't pay to play chicken with cars. Tell you what, on behalf of alert and intelligent cyclists everywhere, I'll bring the margaritas, you bring Jess, Nick and the cat/s. We'll plot how to eradicate the idiots.

3:08 PM, June 13, 2006  
Blogger MilkMaid said...

ahahahahah I can't read past Closet Metro's comment......

6:47 PM, June 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your Five Day hell will end soon enough.

7:06 PM, June 13, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How in the world some people can have total lack of regard for themselves and the sanctity of others is beyond me.

Hope Wobbles therapy pans out babe!

8:05 PM, June 13, 2006  

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