the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Friday, September 14, 2007

Lazy Bucky's quickies

Straight from left field to you:

  • I've had a driver's license since 1990. Never before had I ever gotten a traffic ticket of any kind. Since I moved back to Michigan this year, I have received three, count 'em, three traffic tickets. Suck me, I'm getting a moped.

  • Going into the hospital to get my 'scrips filled today, I saw a big sign for the annual Hospice charity rubber duckie race. Jesus, has it really been almost a year that Mom has been gone? I know the duckie race was going on when we were up here with her last year. It just doesn't seem like it's possibly been that long.

  • Eeyore continues to become the most spoiled cat in the nation. My latest venture is to make him feel like he's being a daring, naughty kitty, which of course he is not. I've seen him drinking water out of dishes in the sink before, so I've started to set a clean bowl on the counter, and now when he drinks out of it, he looks very pleased with himself, like he's filching water from a people bowl and he shouldn't even really be doing it, but isn't he cool? Also, he enjoys scratching the "wood" frame around my office door, and I've noticed that he always makes sure I'm looking before he starts. So I've caught on, and now when he does it, I admonish him in my best mock-stern voice, "Eeyore, what are you doing, you silly kitty?" Then he stops and looks at me, and the expression on his face always says "Ha ha, I got away with that, didn't I? Oh, yeah, I'm a bad-ass!" *sigh* I do so love that boy.

  • Perhaps the strangest injury I've incurred lately is a sore jaw from being kicked in the face. Kicked in the face by a stripper, to be specific. A stripper wearing very high heels. Kids, I can't overemphasize the importance of keeping your face out of the girls' spinning radius. That look right up into her twat will be a short-lived victory when the paramedics are prying your eyeball off of her spike heel.

  • I'm starting to sing again and it's upsetting the cats. Many years ago, my cat Nudgie would vomit and attack me whenever I sang in her presence. Now, it seems that my singing causes aggression, and as soon as I start to karaoke, Eeyore and Thirteen begin to battle right in front of me. I stop? They stop. Just great. "No singing or the black cat gets it."

11 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Bucky,

I like you. I would like you to stick around. Please be sure to wear safety glasses in the future, those strippers are dangerous!

7:15 PM, September 14, 2007  
Blogger Unknown said...

Bucky, I think that I shall respond in kind with a few quickies of my own:

I have had a driver’s license since 1962 and have had several tickets, all for going through red lights.

Time does pass quickly, when we think of a loved one’s death. My father was only 18 months older than I am now when he died in 1984. Still, it seems like yesterday.

Eeyore cannot be more spoiled than Alex. I bet you!

(1) Those high heels strippers wear are dangerous. (2) Never get that close to a dancing stripper, unless you have a $20.00 bill in your hand, which will make her slow down her dancing at least long enough to retrieve it.

Alex does not seem to mind my singing. He has, however, attacked on occasion attacked my guitar strings. (Stupid cat got his paw stuck between the top two).

8:02 PM, September 14, 2007  
Blogger Ms SnS said...

I so love your squabbly puddies!

8:24 PM, September 14, 2007  
Blogger Squirl said...

You and I were just talking about mom today. I keep thinking about "last year at this time...". It seems so long and so short a time ago.

The ticket situation - I got my first traffic ticket a year ago in August. Sucks.

I wish you had video of "the black cat gets it". But, you're busy singing.

Eeyore's never done any of those things when I'm around. Maybe one of these days...

9:36 PM, September 14, 2007  
Blogger Squirl said...

Oh, and it didn't help that Nudgie wound around my ankles and purred when I sang, right?

9:37 PM, September 14, 2007  
Blogger here today, gone tomorrow said...

I think it's about this time last year that I started reading your blog, dear Bucky. I remember susie mentioning your and Squirl's mom. Bless you for indulging Eeyore.

9:45 PM, September 14, 2007  
Blogger Spilling Ink said...

Bucky, would protective goggles impair the view? They sound essential, honey. I mean, how much snatch can you look at if you are blinded? Do take care, huh? Would a mouthguard be overkill?

-- The Safety Patrol

10:26 PM, September 14, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why not get one of those Vespas? Those are so cool looking in a semi-retro, quasi-euro kinda way!

4:31 AM, September 15, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LMAO! I won't ask what you were doing in a strip club looking up at the strippers twat. The more I read of your blog, the more that would seem to be the 'tame' or 'normal' part of your life. ;)

6:24 PM, September 15, 2007  
Blogger eclectic said...

Kicked in the head by a stripper? Meh. That happens to everyone. But role-playing "Naughty Pussy" with an old, gay cat? Dude... that's twisted. ;)

7:17 PM, September 15, 2007  
Blogger Katy Barzedor said...

T - Thanks; I will also wear a helmet. Not just around strippers - I mean all the time.

SSNick - Are you thinking that the red light means "Quick! Run over the Devil!" ? :)

MsSnS - They are always entertaining!

Squirl - Yeah, that thing with Nudgie was really insult to injury.

HTGT - Eeyore gets anything he wants, and that's just as it should be!

Lynn - sounds like you vote for the helmet, too! (And I did not forget my thingie over at your site!)

Maven - why not? I'm already wearing a helmet for the strippers.

Arktist - I just wanted to know if it whistled while she was spinning.

Eclectic - Eeyore's not gay...he's just flexible. He's quite the butch little boyfriend!

11:40 AM, September 16, 2007  

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