Night at the Shop-era

Ashamed as I am to admit it, the Machine Shop opened in Flint in 2002, and last Friday night was the first time I was ever actually inside the place. If I lived that close to that bar now, I'd be there every weekend. Oh, well. At least now I know it's worth a trip to see bands there. The place kicks ass - I'll get pictures next time I go, but the walls are covered in classic tattoo flash and giant paintings of traditional tattoo motifs. The sound in the room is amazing, and the stage is huge. It's a hard rock bar that was built to be a hard rock bar, and a lot of great bands come through there. So FUCK YOU, all you Flintoids who can't stop saying "It doesn't matter if they put a great club with name bands in it - no one will come to Flint." Not true, fuckers. In fact, a whole, packed, sweaty roomful of people came to Flint last Friday, and by the time Black Stone Cherry left the stage, we were all drained, needed a cigarette, and were much too embarrassed to call each other in the morning.







I took way more pictures than what you see here, but unfortunately, not only is my camera pretty crappy, but I was being jostled much of the time, too. I'd managed to be one person back from the stage, and just as BSC made their entrance, this small but solid blonde shoved her way right in front of me and started dancing like she was being yanked around on ropes by angry giants. At first I was really pissed off, because I thought she was trying to knock me out of my spot, and by the power of Greyskull, there was no way I was getting pushed back, so I dug in and held my ground. Just about that time I realized that she wasn't trying to bump me out of the way...she was rubbing her ass all over me, very aggressively. Like, almost knocking me down aggressive. Now, I know I always bitch about not getting any action, but...well, Internet as a Whole, let me whisper this to you: even I have standards. 'Nuff said. I wasn't going to just let her fall over into me, into the other folks who'd been standing there as long as I had, so I was kind of blocking her and catching her when she'd lose her balance; the last thing we all needed was drunk domino people. It would have been easier if I'd just put my arms around her, but, um, there was no fucking way I was encouraging the attention. I breathed a giant sigh of relief when she finally staggered away, probably to go vomit in private (she wanted to preserve that one shred of dignity that she was under the illusion that she still possessed).







BSC burned up the stage, as they are wont to do. The guys all seemed pretty geeked about the packed house, packed like fudge in Boystown. Much to my delight, they added Crosstown Woman to the set; there isn't a song on their CD I dislike, but this is a particular favorite, and they didn't do it last time I saw them. The bass part on that song just rips a hole in the fabric of the universe, and their bass player, Jon Lawhon, deserves a showcase like that. Lots of talent in these baby boys! I'd also mention that they are all fucking adorable, but saying that makes me feel like I should be wearing a trenchcoat and leaning on the schoolyard fence with a bag of candy and an XBox.



"Dude, what the fuck is up with the old bag down there? Is she dressed for a funeral? Take my picture, grandma!"

I stuck around after the show to have a couple of drinks and meet the guys in BSC, got some autographs, bought a great t-shirt, got my picture taken by a fellow straggler who told me she had to get a shot because I looked like a "real rock star" (which I am in my own mind), and then [edited to reduce your potential nausea] went back to my lovely room at the Hookers n' Crack motel (of course I stayed there again, but no condoms were scattered about my car this time). However, I have a few things to say about my latest stay there that will, fortunately for you, need to wait for another post.

Guess what? I just found out there are three concerts I must see in November, all within the same five-day span (one day in between each show): Electric Six, They Might Be Giants, and Candye Kane, all in Grand Rapids. I think I'm going for a new record this year!