the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Step right up

When Jim and I arrived to see Joan Jett at the county fair Thursday night, we were informed that we needed to buy whole-week passes in order to gain admission to the concert. We grumbled a little, but at 25 bucks a pop, it really wasn't a bad deal, even if Joan's show was all we saw.

Since it rained on our parade so badly Thursday, which made me fear for my camera and completely fucked my plans to take nighttime shots of the midway, we decided to go back last night and try our luck again, seein' as how we already had our admission paid and all.

We arrived in style on the back of my favorite racing goat, Farfisa.

My fascination with the midway stretches back as far as I can remember. I grew up in Grand Haven, Coast Guard City if you didn't know, and my biggest thrill of the year would come when the carnival was erected for the week of Coast Guard Festival every August. Compared to fairs and carnivals I've since seen, it was a fairly small and unimpressive display, but it was my only point of reference at that age, and it was the event for which the rest of the year was spent in anticipation.

It wasn't so much that I wanted to go on the rides, because I never got much more daring than the Scrambler - no way in hell was I gettin' on the Zipper! Most of my time was taken by gawkin' at the collective spectacle of it all, the wheezy, groaning contraptions our parents should never have let us ride, the throngs of smarmy teenagers let loose to roam, the aisles of clearly rigged games, the danglin' prizes, the giant stuffed kangaroos and the cocaine mirrors, and maybe the best of all, the way the whole shebang looked at night when all the lights were done up and the place was in full swing. I can still stop, close my eyes, and remember the exact feeling I got, that elation where the chest swells and the brain feels just a little buzzed when you've done nothin' to chemically provoke it, when I would see the lit-up midway for the first time each year.

My swoony infatuation with the midway never went the way of my crush on Daryl Dragon, and I still drag Jim to at least one fair/carnival a year so we can wander the midway at night. Our plan last night was to ride the ferris wheel and get some good elevated picture, but would you believe these fuckers didn't have a ferris wheel? The nerve, the very nerve!

Show us your Tuts!

Ooh! Ooh! It's Daryl Dragon! No, wait...

I don't normally talk to carnies, but I let this one take me home.

Jim and I have decided that, every once in a while, just to broaden our horizons, we should partake in some activity that we would never in a million years have thought we'd do. Last night: tractor pull.
Yes, we did go to the tractor pull. There were more people in the grandstands for the tractor pull than there were for Joan Jett. I'm not sure what that says about the people of Mt. Morris. I have never seen tractors in such a macho display before. Now I'm moist as a snack cake down there, in my pole barn.

As the lights come to life, so does my delight.

Jumbo dream catcher?

Sunset behind the Ring of Fire.

I have to confess something here. A number of years ago, I saw a ride at some street fair that was set up in downtown Flint, and I have since been haunted by the fact that I neither rode the ride nor took any pictures of it. It's kept me awake nights, lyin' there with my tear-puffy eyes as open as they can get, wailin', regrettin', wishin'...

Finally, last night, I was able to atone for these oversights, to lessen the overwhelming stockpile of regret. It's true, I got to ride...The Bee Ride.

Back dat ass up!

If you see me fly over...make a wish!

You all understand, don't you, that it's impossible for me to keep my tongue inside my mouth for more than ten minutes at a time?

I didn't mind the looks I got from the ride operator and from all the children on the ride when I boarded the bee all by my lonesome. I'm pretty accustomed to those "there goes the crazy lady" looks (or "there goes the crazy sir" looks). But as soon as I crawled into the yellowjacket's cockpit, I suddenly got cramps in both feet at once! What was that about? What kind of karma caused this? It's not like I pushed any little kids outta my way to get on or anything (though it was certainly in my plan if need be). But it's okay, I survived the Bee Ride, all my extremeties are intact, and I'm here to tell you all about it.

The darker it got, the more interesting it all was for me and my camera.

Even the ticket booths look cool at night.




It was obvious that rain would start soon, so I didn't get as many shots in total darkness as I'd have liked. This one is probably my favorite:

And then I got on my motherfuckin' bee and rode home.

23 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Kitty said...

Bumble Bucky? Sorry - that back dat ass up shot did it for me :).

10:19 AM, August 21, 2005  
Anonymous dazed and confuzed said...

Oooo...I love fairs...all that cotton candy..pure, unadulterated sugar just WAITING to be smeared on the face. I get to go next month here in Washington...although Joan Jett won't be there, I DO get to see ZZ Top.

11:51 AM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger Squirl said...

I looove the night shots. Yeah, the Coast Guard Festival really wasn't much, but you could walk to it. The fireworks were always the best of the year. So glad you finally got to rid your Bee. (not Aunt Bea, though)

1:24 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Kittay - you like-a the bee's bottom, do you? I'm not surprised you're that kind of girl.

Dazed - Oooooh, I'll bet ZZ Top is a good show. And while I avoided cotton candy, I did eat more of an elephant ear than is prudent. (and they just flashed cotton candy on the ball game on TV here, too weird)

Squirl! Missives from the travelin' Squirl. Hey, when I was a little kid, I thought that carnival was the best thing in the world. And the bee has been a secret wish for a while. And you know how I feel about Aunt Bea.

1:59 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger Susie said...

Thank you for taking us to the fair, Auntie Bucky. A lil ditty for you:

I'm a king bee
buzzing round your hive
I'm a king bee baby
buzzing round your hive
Together we can make honey now baby
If you let me come inside

I'm a king bee
I want you to be my queen
Well I'm a king bee, baby
Want you to be my queen
Well together we can make honey, baby
The world has never seen

Okay let's buzz a while

A buzz buzz (buzz buzz)
A buzz buzz (buzz buzz)
A buzz buzz (buzz buzz)
A buzz buzz (buzz buzz)

2:12 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...


Susie, you rock!

2:17 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger SierraBella said...

The Bee Ride and you took a carnie home?
Whatta night!

2:23 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Sierrabella - I know, I live a charmed life, don't I?

4:07 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

You avoided cotton candy? WTF?!!?

8:26 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger greatwhitebear said...

Hey, did you notice the new flag feature on the button bar? I wonder if you can find out hw many times you've been flagged? We should have a contest to see who can get flagged most often!

8:40 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger whfropera said...

I just thought this might be the right place to mention that they are discussing "furries" over at Waiter Rant.

9:30 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger whfropera said...

GWB - I just read that "flag crap" and I am PISSED.

9:34 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger eclectic said...

What? All this talk about bees and no Sting?

11:27 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger greatwhitebear said...

whfropera- You, me and lot's of other folks. This has been a big subject on a lot of Canadian blogs all day.

You can complain to the people at Blogger/Google by sending an email to: I'm sure they are getting a lot of negative feedback already!

11:48 PM, August 21, 2005  
Blogger LadyBug said...

Heh. You said "erected." Teehee.

(Yes, they are lovely photos. Your imagery was wonderful. But I never got over "the carnival was erected." I am a naughty, naughty LadyBug. But you KNOW you like it.)

9:20 AM, August 22, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Mr. B - while I love the smell of cotton candy, the only sticky stuff I want to have all over my face is...well, human in origin.

Bear and Opera gal - what new bullshit is this "flag" crap? What, just because I'm offensive, they don't think people would wanna read me? Come on!

Eclectic - should I be dreaming of blue turtles now?

LadyBug - can't believe nobody grabbed that and ran with it before now. As always, good eye!

9:57 AM, August 22, 2005  
Blogger whfropera said...

its pure unadulterated censorship - and my take on it is that they will just tell us if we don't like it to go elsewhere. my theory is that Blogger will turn into a "paid" service similar to squarespace, and they want to weed out anything that might damage thier chances at an IPO or venture capital.

11:32 AM, August 22, 2005  
Blogger JessicaRabbit said...

Goats, big goldens heads and bees?

God Im horny now.

12:51 PM, August 22, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Opera gal - god, I hope not. If so, it's Typepad, here I come.

Jess - I knew the bees would getcha.

12:54 PM, August 22, 2005  
Blogger Effie said...

Love the nighttime shots at the fair! And you got to ride a bee--didn't that sting a bit? Haha

12:54 PM, August 22, 2005  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Cotton candyyyyy.....must have candy!

2:57 PM, August 22, 2005  
Blogger Von Krankipantzen said...

That Bee ride looks like so much fun.

4:13 PM, August 22, 2005  
Blogger mister anchovy said...

There was an accident on the Zipper the other day at the Canadian National Exhibition right here in Toronto. The guy who locks everyone in didn't do a proper job in this case, and when they were finishing the ride, a kid fell out, only to be caught by the operator, who had only worked there for a week. The kid was really fortunate to escape any injuries more serious than a chipped tooth.

10:06 PM, August 22, 2005  

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