the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Lazy Bucky's Quickies

Sorry, I missed my Monday post. Because I know all of you were just clamoring for it. Truthfully, I couldn't put two coherent thoughts together with nails and Krazy Glue right now, so how 'bout some brain ping pong?


  • Do you know how hard it is to find a good, satisfying vomit video on YouTube? It's amazing how many clips out there have the keyword "vomit" attached, yet feature absolutely no barfing (Tardist can back me up on this one). In my day, we called that "false advertising."

  • My upper back feels like somebody buried a hatchet diagonally between my shoulder blades. I don't think there's a hatchet in there, but you know how hard it is to see your own back in the mirror. So, if you happen to be missing a hatchet, please come see me.

    Or maybe it's a sign: I'm to be the next lead singer of Molly Hatchet! I have flirted with enough disaster in my life to qualify.

  • How young must you be not to recognize this TV commercial reference?
    "Pretty sneaky, sis."
    (I'm guessing this was probably just an American thing.)

  • People are trying to give me cats and I'm not doing a good job resisting. Somebody needs to slap the livin' shit outta me.

  • I now have in my possession a...a...a...PEE WEE HERMAN POSEABLE ACTION FIGURE! Oh, and much, much more. There will be a pictorial, a glorious and explicit one, in the very near future. This, my friends, is exactly why I bought a macro lens. *sigh*

23 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Bone Machine said...

Connect Four or Battleship or some shit like that?

10:08 AM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Ding ding ding ding!

Yes, it was Connect Four!

"Where?"
"Here, diagonally!"
"Pretty sneaky, sis."

10:27 AM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

*thinks he'll offer to do the shit slapping*

11:33 AM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Squirl said...

I had to google it. I remembered the line but not what the ad was for.

Shall I personally volunteer to slap you so you don't take on any more cats?????

:-)

12:11 PM, July 10, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bucky,

Go see Amy Winehouse for me and write a review!

Anne Admirerererer

1:42 PM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Mr. B, Squirl - but they're kittehs! I can't has a kitteh?

Anne A. - I'd gladly go if I thought for sure she'd show up! :D

2:13 PM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Squirl said...

Um, you really shouldn't has a kitteh, you know. We'd all love it, of course, but you know what they say, three's company. At what point do you have a doggone hootenany?

3:29 PM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger eclectic said...

***whispers conspiratorially*** (Watch Nilbo's head explode)

So... if someone offers you their pussy, you can't refuse? Is that what I hear you saying??


***smirk***

3:51 PM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger here today, gone tomorrow said...

oooooo...eclectic!!! Snap!

8:09 PM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Squirl - I think it's already verging on a shindig.

Eclectic - do you think it's wise to taunt an, um, almost-grandfather?

HTGT - yeah, suddenly I have pussy coming at me from all directions.

8:44 PM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Circus Kelli said...

Hi! Where is the "slap the living shit outta Bucky" line?

10:06 PM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Go to the Amy Winehouse thing with your video camera and if she does vomit on stage, you’ll have a video for You Tube.

And, please remember, Bucky, kittens turn into cats and if you ain’t careful with ‘em they create more kittens.

10:38 PM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

CKelli - Geez, I didn't think that'd be such a popular option.

Maybe I should wear Kevlar?

SS Nick - Oh, I don't stop likin' 'em when they're not kittens anymore...but I DO make sure that proper snippage takes place on the reproductive organs of all my little charges, before they can have the chance to make me a grandmother.

11:50 PM, July 10, 2007  
Blogger Lynn said...

A Pee Wee Herman poseable action figure, huh? I KNOW this is gonna be good.

12:48 AM, July 11, 2007  
Anonymous Madame D said...

PEE WEE!!!!!
Oh, I am SO excited!

3:41 AM, July 11, 2007  
Blogger Bone Machine said...

I'm afraid of the prizes for the correct guess, so I will just shut the fuck up about it.

1:18 PM, July 11, 2007  
Anonymous Susie said...

Yep, you're headed for a goddam hootenanny!

Are you telling us someone stabbed you in the back?

I thought AW just sang about being a drunk. I didn't know she really was. Love her voice, though.

6:06 PM, July 11, 2007  
Anonymous Susie said...

AND, sisters, aren't we ALL so proud of little Eclectic? *sniff*

6:07 PM, July 11, 2007  
Blogger Flying Mermaid said...

I'd KILL to see Amy Winehouse, probably even let her barf in my mouth if need be, but then, why would need be?

As for the TV reference, I do believe I'm too OLD.

9:38 PM, July 11, 2007  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Lynn - Pee Wee and Oscar Wilde are already getting on famously.

Madame D - just don't get so excited that you rub one out in a public theater.

Bone - the prize is that you have to come play Connect Four with me for a solid month.

Susie - I just don't think "stabbed" is a strong enough word for what it feels like!

Mermaid - I'll have you know, I saw your comment on my phone when I was checking my mail at the concert last night, and I nearly lost it right there in the crush by the front of the stage! I needed that laugh...

9:47 AM, July 12, 2007  
Blogger Bone Machine said...

Will transporation be provided and will I be publicly humilated when I lose?

5:39 PM, July 12, 2007  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Yes and yes.

9:33 PM, July 12, 2007  
Blogger Bone Machine said...

My past win-lose record on Connect Four was, in a word, "shit."

11:45 AM, July 16, 2007  

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