the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Monday, April 24, 2006

They call me Auntie Bitch

As I've mentioned here before, my supposedly cat-free bedroom holds a nearly irresistable allure for the cats in this house. Since the little fuckers gang up on me and sneak in anyway, I've just resigned myself to the fact that I will occasionally have an inquisitive little feline visitor, and my best bet is to let him or her explore a bit, and then try to escort the intruder gently out the door at my first opportunity.

Shy little Nala was being pretty insistent at my door last night, and being the total suckaaah I am for her little orange face, I invited her in. She timidly walked the border of the room, sniffing here and there, ears alert, nose and whiskers active the entire time. Eventually, she came to the closet, and like any self-respecting cat, she had to see what was inside (well, I'm not in there anymore).

I went about my business, assuming she wouldn't make any trouble while my back was turned, and harbored that assumption until I heard a little skritching sound. When I turned around, this is what I saw:

I'm a bitch, part 1

Poor Nala had gotten behind some tall boxes, and couldn't get a good enough grip to pull herself back up, and didn't have enough room to make the jump.

Now, seeing that, who wouldn't scramble to help the tiny, sweet li'l cat who just wasn't tall enough to do it herself?

You know who? The kind of bastard who would then grab her camera and take half a dozen shots before assisting, that's who.

I'm a bitch, part 2

I'm a bitch, part 3

I'm a bitch, part 4

I'm a bitch, part 5

I'm a bitch, part 6

While I did (eventually) rescue Nala, you shouldn't be surprised if you read someday that she's sucked the breath out of me in my sleep and now carries my soul, hers to torment for all eternity.

I guess that would mean it was curtains for me.

Custom rockin' curtains

Ain't they cool? Jess made these for me, since there is some sort of plaid requirement of which I was unaware. I'm so grateful to her, because otherwise, I would have no clue as to the proper Muff Diver accessorization scheme. So much to keep track of! I sure as hell hope there are no membership fees.

She also put this groovy film on my windows, so I can shake it naked in my room all I want without causing the neighbors undue trauma.

My windows

Now nobody can see me in here being mean to the cats...

28 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Nilbo said...

Why are there still boxes that have not been unpacked? What, too tired after a long day at wo - ooops, nope, can't be that. You must be just bone fricking lazy.

Stop teasing the goddamn cat and get unpacked, lazy-ass.

10:26 PM, April 24, 2006  
Blogger Effie said...

and now your room is all purty, ain't it?! Love the window film...I didn't see any of that when I was fixing up this place--we ended up using some of the spray-on glass etching stuff!

Poor Nala--Bucky--you're definitely in for it!

10:34 PM, April 24, 2006  
Blogger eclectic said...

Hell hath no fury like a pussy scorned.


(I've said "pussy" for two comments in a row, now. I feel so naughty!)

11:31 PM, April 24, 2006  
Blogger Unknown said...

Just remember, Bucky, trapped cats can be dangerous to would-be rescuers. I speak from experience.

11:32 PM, April 24, 2006  
Blogger Unknown said...

I love the windows! But you know, you'd think you be a LEETLE bit more forth-coming with the pussy rescue.

11:37 PM, April 24, 2006  
Blogger Candy said...

Im glad you like the curtains baby. Purple and green is the color combination of happiness.

Or bat shit insanity, if your The Joker.

Either way, it works.

11:54 PM, April 24, 2006  
Blogger I'm not here. said...

Poor pussy...
I like the curtains and the stuff you put on the window...what is that stuff?
I wanna get some of that for my bedroom. :o)

12:45 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Madame D said...

I like the curtain film, but I LOVE Nala.
She reminds me of my last kitty, and I just want to hug her and squeeze her and love her and kiss her and call her george...

1:04 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Soooo, are there any cats at this new place of residence?

8:31 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger hemlock said...

I loved the part about 'not being in there anymore!' And that film on the windows? WAY TOO COOL! Tres classy.

9:06 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger said...

Sniff some pussy and its curtains for you.

10:12 AM, April 25, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Plaid requirement--check.
Hot girlfriend--check.
Your fill of pussies--check. (double entendre anyone?)
Congratulations, Bucky, I think you are well on your way!

10:20 AM, April 25, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, I forgot--I really like that window film stuff--where did Jess get it?

10:20 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Phoebe Fay said...

Poor Nala! But lucky for her, with the allergies and all, she gets her revenge just by existing.

And Jess is going to have to have to start a whole home decorating blog because I, too, love the window film. (I was going to say you should, but then I remembered the paint job!)

11:14 AM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Unknown said...

Very cool, Bucky! Well, the room, not the grabbing the camera, taking pictures and THEN helping the cat part... hee...

Very cool window film, and I LOVE the curtains! :)

Now I want to go and get all creative at my house...

12:21 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Unknown said...

You know, I've seen Nilbo commenting on several blogs over the past few days, and he seems to be quite cranky lately...

12:21 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger limpy99 said...

Am I the only one who was cheering for Mr. Hanky?

4:04 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Unknown said...

Limpy. Yes.

4:57 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Katy Barzedor said...

That window stuff comes on a roll - you just cut it to size, wet down the window, peel the backing off the film, and smooth it on. It's also removable - I guess you just heat it and peel, and then you can reuse it! I just don't see a downside to this stuff.

We got this at Lowe's, but I would imagine it's available at any home improvement store. All in all, it cost around $30 to do two windows, and I'm ultra, ultra happy with the look (and the fact that the mullethead neighbors can't see into my room anymore).

5:31 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Squirl said...

Wait, I thought I commented on this one. Anyway, cool stuff in your room. Your "cat-free" room.

8:05 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Pissy Britches said...

You HAB, you gotta be helping out the kitty cat.
Very cute kitty cat at that.
Muff Diver Assesoration??
Your killin me.

9:57 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Kranki said...

Poor kitty but, yeah, I'd totally do the same thing. AND laugh. Out loud. I guess it isn't so funny when I find the poop in my shoe.

11:38 PM, April 25, 2006  
Blogger Unknown said...

your room looks as messy as my house

I think I love you.

I got a new tv cabinet thingy from JDRose (who I SO caught having a ciggie on the weekend) and I am so happy because it has a back on it (unlike my old one) so I can cram shit that I don't need between it and the wall and no one will be any the wiser. muahahahaha
heaven help my cat if he happens to fall down there. I, unlike your gracious self, will NOT help.

3:27 AM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger MilkMaid said...

Well...I lost all thoughts on my comment after BIG PENIS SEX.


4:14 AM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger Unknown said...

Big Penis Sex does that to a person, Milkmaid.

2:05 PM, April 26, 2006  
Blogger Squirl said...

One of the reasons I keep word verification on is because it turns out to be pretty funny sometimes.

But its funny doesn't beat this spam comment you got.

2:43 PM, April 26, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're evil Buckster - pure evil.

Do I grab the camera every time my kitties get into a (non-dangerous!) but funny situation, before assisting? You bet I do :-)

Btw that cat is sooooooooooooo cute!!

10:51 AM, April 28, 2006  
Blogger Maven said...

Love the film on the windows! Great color scheme too! Hope you're settling into your new digs!

PS: You know you ain't really settled in until the neighbors see your assless chaps!!

5:28 PM, April 28, 2006  

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