the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Saturday, November 12, 2005

525,600 minutes

Cotillion Party Hat

A year ago today, I felt the overwhelming need to tell the world that using a noun as a verb will only lead to anal sex. And for some reason, people came back.

I'm as shocked as you are that I'm still here, one year later. Last year at this time, I was still new to this whole " blogging" concept, and I was still totally floored by the idea that I could write about anything, and publish it for the world to see. Of course, I didn't expect so many earthlings to take me up on the invitation - I was so embarassed to find I didn't have enough cookies and tea for everyone. Luckily, I was able to bridge the gap with stale pizza and near beer.

I know a lot of you from the golden days of Dooce comments, but there are many more of you that have wandered over here from other places, or just at random. I'm grateful for the fact that you read my ramblings, you leave me mostly kind comments, and you continue to come back here even after I publish for days on end about urine and Homies. There are some of you I consider real friends, too, and you've shown me extraordinary kindness, understanding, and a million private jokes. I'll bet I've laughed more in the last year than I have since I was a child discovering nitrous oxide.

"Sincere" is not usually my strong suit, but I would like to thank y'all for makin' this site more than an exercise in literary masturbation. I'd still do it, probably, but it wouldn't be nearly as fun without you guys here.

CONTEST ANNOUNCEMENT: Ghost of Goldwater was the first to correctly guess that the title of my last post is, indeed, Joe Pantoliano's line from the Wachowski brothers' movie, Bound. Ghost receives 500 Bonus Bucky Points, which are good for nothing but braggin' rights in the schoolyard.

41 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Squirl said...

FIRST!

4:35 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger Tardist said...

Dag! You beat me! We're all proud of you, Bucky, for giving everyone the chance to view your 'interesting' views.

4:44 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger Susie said...

ooh, ooh, third! I love you! Thanks for blogging! Gotta go before someone sneaks in ahead of me! I'm the first outside the original family!

FIRST!

4:52 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger Ghost of Goldwater said...

And I'm the FIRST EUROPEAN to comment!

Thank you for providing us with your more or less daily rants, they are a welcome oasis of madness in the otherwise dull and dreary life of a high-school teacher. I'm afraid your bragging points won't do me much good in my particular schoolyard... I was kinda hoping they could be changed into frequent flier miles or something like that, since it's been way too long since I was in the US last...

PS: The movie title was found by means of thorough googling, I'd never even heard of the movie ;o)

6:02 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger Nina said...

Well I am not first, second or third. Oh wait outside of the family I am.
Yah~hoo!

Nina

6:27 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger Jim said...

Happy Anniversary, Buckaroo! Remember 'Pork' falls into that Noun/Verb catagory too.

Luckily, my comments are after Nanina's...and we all know what THAT means.

6:43 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Glad you stuck around, Bucky, until I arrived.

6:59 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger PlazaJen said...

Happy BlogBirthday, Bucky! Thanks for sticking that song from "Rent" in my head, too!

I hope someone made you a cake. Topped with Homies.
(that would actually rock.)

7:14 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Squirl - oh, sure, just 'cause you were sittin' next to me on the couch when I posted it!

Tarrrrrrdist - 'interesting' meaning fucked up?

Susie - awwwwwwww, I love you, man! You know you're the third sister...

Ghost - I'm just grateful you brought the merkin to the table.

Nina - you know you can always win, place or show here!

Jim - didn't you coin the phrase "dooceketeers"?

SS Nick - glad you found your way over here!

PlazaJen - heh heh, I'd apologize for the earworm, but you know I'm not the least bit sorry.
And that's a good cake idea...I'll have to get somebody on the Homies cake project.

8:41 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger Torrie said...

Awwwww. We love you and your urine, Bucky.

11:31 PM, November 12, 2005  
Blogger Momentarily_Distracted said...

Happy Blogaversary!
I had an earlier comment, but my computer died before I could post.
:::holds up a virtual whiskey sour:::
Here's to assless chaps, butt plugs, Dooce, and Monkey.
Cheers!
:o)

12:43 AM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Torrie - durn it, now I'm all verklempt. As is my urine.

M_D - Thanks for the virtual toast! Now I wish I'd brought the chaps along for the weekend...

1:09 AM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger JessicaRabbit said...

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo, you look like a monkey, and you smell like...

not catfood.


Happy birthday to the most monkiest blog around.

1:58 AM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger mrtl said...

Ah, Bucky! I'm all chocked up. This is so sweet!

Happy Blogiversary!

2:12 AM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger whfropera said...

jumping on the happy happy joy joy bandwagon here...
thanks for making me laugh a lot, think even more, and meet some great people!
you're a great bud.

3:34 AM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger hellokittn said...

I'm glad to have the oportunity to be infected with your humor, wit, and cynacism.

If it weren't for coming here and being your reader, I don't think I would have choked on a mouthful of popcorn in the theatre so badly when Chicken Little said "MAN THE PORK SHIELDS RUNT. IT'S TIME TO ENGAGE."

You're like mental herpes Bucky. No amount of ointments' going to make this go away.

8:03 AM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Happy anniversary baby
got you on my
mi-ind

Woo hoo!

12:01 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Curtis said...

Add one more "congrats" from the peanut gallery! What I especially like about your blog is that it is full of humor. I like humor. Usually because it's funny.

12:59 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Susie said...

chchchchia, you're lucky that's all you got infected with, hanging out here ;)

1:35 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger eclectic said...

Bucky's FunHouse, serving the pubic for 365 days and counting.


***Can I be your ad agency?***

1:57 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Bone Machine said...

Congratulations on one year of dropping some high-quality kick ass shit on an unsuspecting world. It's a great thing and the packaging does not suck.

One of these days, I will look up "Cotillion" in the dictionary and see if I should be wearing formal wear while visiting this sacred space.

3:28 PM, November 13, 2005  
Anonymous sheryl said...

I've loved you from that first post I read, about the diarrhea and the hot tub. LOVED YOU from that moment, and to this day, still love you. And love your tales of alleged hot dogs, er, lips & ass.

Happy Bloggerversary - and many more!

7:10 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Von Krankipantzen said...

Happy Blogday! Cheerfully Gnawing On Our Brains Since 2004.

7:12 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger whfropera said...

Bone Machine - did you misplace your prom invite??

8:32 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Jess - not smelling like cat food is a great accomplishment for this blog - and for me. Thanks for noticing. And "the most monkiest blog around" just might be the next masthead...

Mrtl - are you all verklempt too? Thanks for comin' all the way from the arctic circle to visit. ;)

Opera gal - you always bring sparkling wit, and elbow-length gloves, to the party. A curtsy to you.

Killer - "You're like mental herpes Bucky. No amount of ointments' going to make this go away." *sniff* I'm gonna cry again, that's so beautiful, man...

Mr. B - now, did you have to bring the whole Little River Band with you? I'll have to send out for more Foster's...

Curtis - welcome to my swirling cesspool of wrongness! Funny about humor, eh?

Susie - I may have falsely promised Rice-a-Roni, the San Francisco Treat, but the word "penicillin" never left my lips.

Eclectic - do you think we could get Paris Hilton as a spokes-skank?

Bone Machine - you mean to tell me you haven't been wearing your best prom tux every time you commented here? Say it isn't so! Henceforth, I expect ruffles and cummerbunds.

Sheryl - I knew I loved you when you understood and appreciated my diarrhea poetry. Many more to you, too, and don't forget to clean the hot tub!

Kranki - you know I'd never gnaw hard enough to break the membrane, right?

Opera gal - apparently so.

I love youse guys! Thanks for comin' around and makin' me feel like less of a wanker.

8:35 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Bone Machine said...

No, but I did lose my top hat and cane.

8:36 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Meggan said...

Ahh, the good old days of the Dooce comments. Happy blogaversary!

10:05 PM, November 13, 2005  
Blogger Nilbo said...

Umm ... I'm the first Nilbo ...

... and I just want to say thanks for being one of my favourite bloggers, thanks for being you, and most of all ...

... thanks for all the fish.

11:58 PM, November 13, 2005  
Anonymous dblues said...

Where's the cake and ice cream???????

2:29 AM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger spoonleg said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:38 AM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger spoonleg said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:41 AM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger spoonleg said...

That was me, that was me. I'm an asshole and I fucked up your comments.

Happy Blog Birthday, Bucky. Have some anal sex, on the house.

Tammy Littlenut: Are you thinking about sex already?
Jerri Blank: Does a pimp carry a razor?

4:43 AM, November 14, 2005  
Anonymous minxlj said...

Happy Anniversary! Someone should bake you a cake, with monkeys on it of course :-)

8:17 AM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger LadyBug said...

Happy Blogiversary, Bucky!

(Sorry, that's all I got. My caffeine hasn't kicked in yet.)

9:50 AM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger Torrie said...

Minxlj said
"Someone should bake you a cake, with monkeys on it of course"

If I could figure out a way to mail it to you, I would bake you a monkey cake!

10:41 AM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger Nilbo said...

... thus allowing her to eat her monkeys and have them, too ...

11:12 AM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger Effie said...

Wow--a virtual Bucky love-in!

Gotta have some cum-cake with monkeys and Homies on it--now that would be something to see (or not!)

I luvs ya Bucky--you inspired me to blog! (and corrupted me at the same time!)

11:22 AM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger Random and Odd said...

Bucky...you made Dooce's comments worth reading.

You make EVERYONE'S comment section worth reading when you leave a comment.

*hug* Don't you EVER go away

12:42 PM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger Amy said...

39th!
Happy Anniversary to the most fun blog and blogger this side of planet erf.

12:58 PM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Bone Machine - they're in the back seat of my car, along with your socks.

Meggan - thank you so much, my long-lost daugher from that tryst with Weird Al Yankovic! :)

Nilbo - you know I'll always keep some sardines for you, darlin'. And a rolling pin.

dblues - the ice cream is in my room, heh heh heh. Don't forget your spoon. ;)

Spoonie - anal sex? On the house?
I'd prefer it bent over the couch, if it's all the same to you.
And you brought Jerri to the party too...*sigh*

Minxlj - I think somebody should get on that monkey right away! 'Cause who doesn't want to lick the frosted monkey?

LadyBug - that's perfectly fine - deep thoughts are not required here. Just dirty ones, and I know you can always do that. ;)

Torrie - just the fact that you conceived the monkey cake for me in your mind is enough. That way, the contents do not settle during shipping.

Nilbo - oh, I see you want some frosted monkey, too. That's okay - plenty of monkey for everyone at the party!

Effie - were you such a nice girl before you came here? Muahahahaaaaaaa! Welcome to the dark side!

Kristine - awwww, that's so sweet, I'm all verklempt, and - HEY! Did you just touch my ass while you were hugging me? Did you guys see that? Kristine grabbed my ass!
God, I love blogaversaries...

Amy - thanks! Now I must check out what's on the other side of that planet erf...

All y'all - thanks so much for your sweet comments, and for the fact that you've continued to come here and see what the fuck is wrong with me every day. Because there will always be something more wrong with me, every day.
I love you guys.

1:14 PM, November 14, 2005  
Blogger Circus Kelli said...

Happy Blogaversary!

Woo-hoo! I'm 41st!

4:18 PM, November 14, 2005  

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