the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

The '80s made me the freak I am today

It's one of those days where inspiration is harder to grasp than a greasy weasel. The best thing for those situations is to randomly grab one of my old notebooks, and marvel at how very disturbed I was, even in my early 20s.

An excerpt dated 9-19-87:

There's a spirit standing around the corner (I like to call him "Ghost") and he's always pointing his finger at me (he wears white gloves).

The silent diatribe that Roscoe delivered with one single glancing blow from his half-lidded eyes was all but ignored by the hovering handi-nurse in her irritatingly efficient white smock, with her lips puckered in readiness to kiss any bruises that might require such attention.

Wow. Whatever the fuck that meant. Back away slowly and smile, I'm usually harmless.

Even more than my, ah, interesting prose, this particular notebook, dated 9-12-87 through 6-1-88, is a veritable goldmine of tasteless drawings. This will require multiple posts, because there are just too many to dump on you all at once. There's even one I've found that's so bad I won't show it here; let's just say that one of the talk bubbles reads: Oh Cornelius...it must be love! You make my stumps bleed!

Freak.

Here are some details from a page dated 9-12-87:

I clearly needed a better hobby
Kinda looks like that 10 gauge needle that went through my nipple.

This is what many of my dates looked like in the '80s
Slap this man at your own risk.

I may have mentioned here at some time or another that I tend to draw huge schlongs when I'm cartooning. Freud wouldn't have to dig too deep on this stuff, know what I'm sayin'? Still, this one, undated but likely from late September, 1987, makes me wonder what the hell I was sniffin' when I took up the pen that day:

What the fuck was I sniffing?

You think it can't get any more disgusting and bizarre than that? Ahem! Dost thou remember wherefore art thou? And this is only today's installment.

For my favorite of the day, even though the name on the whale's tattoo is spelled incorrectly, I give you this full-page entry from 9-18-87 (if you want to see it larger, click to see it in Flickr):


What the hell is wrong with me?


Again, and that means not for the first time, I have to ask myself why my parents didn't hold me in the baptismal font a little longer...

Oh, but wait. There will be more. I will not be stopped. Well, not without a court order.

30 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Dang Cold.. said...

The first pic is Cain as he murders his brother Abel. That swine.

The second is Job being tested by the god with some dude laughing at him in the background.

The third is some sinner in Sodom who's about to get cooked alive. Once again, by god.

The fourth is Jonah inside the whale but something went horribly wrong with his exit. Oh and he's got an Imelda Marcos thing going on with his hair.

See Bucky, the bible is in you no matter how hard you try to run and down a mickey with Satan.

Hope you're well old friend.

dc

10:52 PM, November 29, 2005  
Blogger whfropera said...

Bucky, the best part of this is that I come here for a respite - there is a shitstorm going on about my radio show last week that has the opera community taking sides! LOL - who woulda thunk it?

11:06 PM, November 29, 2005  
Blogger Momentarily_Distracted said...

:::grins:::
I knew there was a reason for stopping by this place.

Thanks! :o)

11:09 PM, November 29, 2005  
Blogger eclectic said...

The Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion: Now with EEE-Normous Schlongs and Naked Spout Riding!


I so wanna be your ad agency.

11:26 PM, November 29, 2005  
Blogger Random and Odd said...

uh.
um.

*backing up slowly*

Oh, and your package...is in the mail.

SHIT, now you know my address!

12:18 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger mrtl said...

Oh Bucky.

1:35 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger JD's Rose said...

Bucky, you make me wonder whether the drugs in the 80's were just a little stronger than they are now.

4:59 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger JessicaRabbit said...

But at least her pussy doenst smell like.. ahhh... nevermind!

7:47 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Madame D said...

"Into waves of giggly, drooling big en-joy"
I'm still trying to figure that out, but nice job on the armpit hair!

8:03 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Spikey1 said...

I don't think I can talk to you anymore! ;)

8:26 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Susie said...

Here's me, looking at these drawings by Bucky Four-Eyes, Blog Godmother. And then here's me, looking at these drawings done by a 17-year-old school girl. I am conflicted. Here's me, just shutting up now.

9:13 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Circus Kelli said...

Um. Wow. You're quite the little artist Bucky. Remind me to keep my kids far away from you, ok? :)

(Dang! Excellent comment!)

9:35 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Nina said...

ROFL, Huge Schlongs and Yick smells like fish ~ Now I have to wipe my coffee off of my monitor.

Nina

9:57 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Squirl said...

I never end up with coffee spray on my monitor when I read Bucky. I'm always expecting the unexpected. It's just bad when I look at these pictures while I'm at work. Thank goodness I have a laptop with a small screen. Small enough, anyway, for me to sit in front of and block the aisleway's view. :-)

10:10 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger AlRo said...

Holy Sweet Jesus ... get this woman some HEL..... hey wait a minute! Something about that chick riding a whale naked is hot ... hmmmm.....

*runs away really fast!*

10:13 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Ghost of Goldwater said...

Just for the record, I'd like to state that

1) I'm not a spirit (more like a demon)
2) I don't stand around corners (I slouch)
3) I don't point fingers (they're usually lodged up my nose)
4) I never, never, EVER wear white gloves. (The snot marks are too visible)

Glad we got that cleared up.

10:57 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger LadyBug said...

A court order, huh? I'm calling my attorny now.

11:32 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger LadyBug said...

Shit. AttornEy.

I'm also calling my proofreader.

11:34 AM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Mel said...

You are too funny1 Glad I stopped by. later...

12:08 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Dang - good to see ya, dude! And yes, you are right, deep down in my heart, the bible is written in tiny, tiny letters...

Opera gal - okay, please elaborate...I am morbidly curious now about what would divide the opera community in that way. What have you done, young lady?

M_D - I try to be your best source of all whale-related porn.

Eclectic - can you sell me to middle America?

Kristine - muahahahaaaaa! Yes, I'll be stalking you immediately. Could you, um, pick me up at the airport, though?

Mrtl - I will have to take that to mean "More schlong pictures, please!"

Kylz - the drugs were exactly the same, but I was weaker then. ;)

Jess - actually, it smells like Super Supper.

Madame D - heh, kinda sounds like badly translated Japanese to English, doesn't it?

Spikey1 - Hey, you got boob drawrings, what's the problem, dude?

Susie - if any of your patients ever bring you pictures like this, you SHOULD worry.

CKelli - heh heh heh, it's just my little way of assuring I'm NEVER asked to babysit, by anyone.

Nina - I think I owe you a cup or so of coffee... :)

Squirl - it would be a little tough to explain, wouldn't it? "Oh, my sister did that...from the institution."

Alshrim - it's okay, you can admit it - that bitch ridin' the spout is smokin'!

Ghost - point taken. I shall arrange for some green gloves for you forthwith.

LadyBug - that's ok, I'll just bring my bodeyguard. ;)

Mel - thanks! You can always come here and find something to make your brain feel greasy.

2:13 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Bucky, what can I say? I read Jessica and she has posted drawings of hairy ass holes. Then I come to you for enlightenment and find…

Thanks for pulling me a bit out of today’s fog.

3:20 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Random and Odd said...

BUCKY GOT SPAMMMMMMMMM

BUCKY GOT SPAMMMMMMM!!!

Neeener Neenner NNNNNEEEENER.


Welcome to WORD VERIFICATION CLUB!

3:51 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger hellokittn said...

*Wondering what kind of odd Google hits the Cotillion shall appear upon due to this masquerade of humor and delight*

Seriously though, who would object to her own personal blow hole?

pfffft. and stuff.

3:53 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Curtis said...

Yes, all of those comments are very nice, but is it ART?!?

6:32 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Annejelynn said...

"WTF" is right!

8:05 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

SS Nick - glad to be part of the one-two punch that makes you grin. You need it. You need all the grins you can get.

Kristine - still resisting the word ver thing...so far I've been able to delete the shit without too much trouble. I hope the fuckers don't make me eat my words.

KChia - I think it's every American's right to have a personal blowhole. It's implied in the Bill of Rights.

Curtis - less like art, more like one step above poop flinging.

Annejelynn - I try to be your one-stop shop for a hearty helping of WTF.

8:09 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger Ern said...

Is Roscoe's nurse by any chance one hovering Miss Spoonie?

8:39 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger MilkMaid said...

:::please God, don't let Little Kid find this book mark ::::

8:58 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger greatwhitebear said...

Bucky, you are truly sick.. and that's why we love you so much!

10:27 PM, November 30, 2005  
Blogger hemlock said...

Dang. You got some skill girl!!!

Nice drawings.

8:49 AM, December 01, 2005  

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