the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Friday, November 25, 2005

Now with pictures of boobs!

Since some of you *coughGreatwhitebear and Spikey1cough* needed visuals to fully understand the complexities of my attempted and failed nipple piercings, I have graciously provided illustrations of the salient points here. Note: these graphics are not suitable for anyone past the mental age of 12 years old.

Here's me with my pre-pierced, unadorned, virginal breasts.
The story of my nipple piercings 1
Okay, so I might have taken a little artistic license with the size of my boobs. Well, too fuckin' bad. That's why this is the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion, and not the Court of Public Opinion About My Exaggerated Tits Cotillion.


The first piece of jewelry? The one that was obviously too small for my mighty nipple? Here's a couple of mugshots (jugshots?) to show you how it fit me.
The story of my nipple piercings 2
It's just like a nipple in bondage, boy...


The story of my nipple piercings 3



Here's about how the 10-gauge needle looked as he steered it toward my nipple (which may or may not have been silently screaming):
The story of my nipple piercings 4
It really did feel like a nip-kebob.


The first ring that went in there bordered on gargantuan:
The story of my nipple piercings 5
"What knockers!" "Thank you, doctor."


Then I tried the barbell:
The story of my nipple piercings 6
I could do some pretty mean curls with this one, too.



All in all, I'm just glad this never happened:
The story of my nipple piercings 7

I hope everybody had a groovy Thanksgiving, and if this post made you lose your turkey and dressing, then I'm almost genuinely sorry.

34 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Effie said...

Oh--lovely drawings Bucky--that last one--LOL! your poor nip's to go through all that torture--tassles with bats on 'em, clearly, are the way to go!

Hope your Thanksgiving was wonderful and filling!

4:08 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger Squirl said...

Bucky is sick and wrong. That's probably why there's such a strong following here. :-)

4:19 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger Susie said...

Thank you, squirl, for helping me find the words . . . I was stuck on "ohdeargod" . . .

4:27 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger Bone Machine said...

That's why I show up.

You should sell those animation cels on Ebay and bring in stout coin.

4:28 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger Pissy Britches said...

Fabulous.
Thanks for illustrating.
Nice tits.

4:50 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

I KNEW there was a reason I kept checking back here for three days waiting for your next post. It was worth it! Bucky, you have brought some radiance and merriment into this otherwise cold and drab day after Thanksgiving. Thanks. (Now, if I just had some live, flesh and blood boobs—pierced or un-pierced—in the house to play with, all would be perfect).

6:06 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger Nilbo said...

It's like the Family Circus ...

"Who deflated Bucky's boobies?"

"Not me!"

"Not me!"

"Not me!"

8:09 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger hellokittn said...

Holy Giblets Bucky!

That is all. That is all.

9:25 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger Momentarily_Distracted said...

Quit drawing pictures of my boobs!
Oh, wait...they're still perky.
*embarrassed giggle*
My bad.
I got some tube boobs over here. Looks like another set of arms when I bend over to grab my bra off the floor. Can't stand back up quickly for the risk of whiplash.
Getting older sucks donkey dick.

9:33 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger greatwhitebear said...

Just the mental picture of your breast doing "boob curls" is worth the whole post.

Nice hooters, btw.

11:47 PM, November 25, 2005  
Blogger JD's Rose said...

That is funny as hell Bucky!

12:31 AM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger GW said...

Knock Knock.

Who all's there?

Dbluu

dbluu who?

Dbluu Buckaroo

Sorry if that knocker...I mean knock, knock joke hurt...Hey...I found my way back from the 1000 points of light my dad always teld me about.
I followed some lights after my horse left me months a couple a months ago endin up at some week long festival where the people told me they would burn a man at the end of the week. They was so excited it terrfied me and I escaped before them weirdos took me by way of the fire of Hell.
Wish ya coulda been there so I coulda hid behind those prize babes of kush a yours.
GW

1:22 AM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger AlRo said...

That is fuckin' HILARIOUS !!!

You should submit this artwork to a museum and demand millions... it's both visually stimulating, yet frightningly educational!

8:26 AM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger Torrie said...

BEST. POST. EVER.

9:49 AM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger SunDenine said...

Anticipating a side shot and actually seeing one, stimulated my mind to once again re-examine my sexual preferances. I concluded that...well...your little head self-portrait ...those big boobs, the "door"knocker...excuse me while I go and "recompose" myself.

10:47 AM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger SunDenine said...

Did I mention your shades, your long arms and your mention of working out, your serious unchanging expression?
Christ, just push me up against the nearest wall and do me now.

10:53 AM, November 26, 2005  
Anonymous labels for wedding favors said...

I have been on-line searching for hours for information regarding labels for wedding favors and stumbled across your blog during my journey :-) Blogger your blog is really amazing! Keep up the great work. Obviously my search on labels for wedding favors was way off when compared to Now with pictures of boobs! and find it funny how it landed me here. The internet is a funny thing. Anyways, great job on your blogging and keep up the good work! I been searching for labels for wedding favors for over 2 hours and needed a break from it. I started reading your blog and really started getting into it.
P.S I will add you to my favorites so I can come back and visit later
P.S.S If you want to bookmark my site I am at labels for wedding favors. You never know you may find some good deals!

2:28 PM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger MilkMaid said...

HA ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!

Nice chesticles!

3:11 PM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger Nilbo said...

Dear Labels for Wedding Favors, you spamming prick,

The only wedding favors Bucky believes in carry the label "Warning: Wash Carefully After Use."

And she lets me do the washing.

That is all.

3:33 PM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger SierraBella said...

My husband wandered by, saw the drawings and said Is that Bucky?

OK lady, just how does he know your boobs???

5:26 PM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger Nilbo said...

Did he ever serve in the Seventh Fleet...? Maybe that's how he knows them.

6:32 PM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger MrsDoF said...

I came over here because Nilbo said that Susie was cursing and swearing on Bucky's blog. And She Is!
Also duly noted is much in the way of shenanigans.
Your drawings are accurate in excruciating detail and my own memory got jostled.
To be brave enough to get nipples pierced must mean that you've lost the lesson learned of a baby cutting his 8th tooth who would bite down hard enough to bring the blood.
Good thing Nilbo is here doing the washing up.

6:53 PM, November 26, 2005  
Anonymous country wedding favors said...

Sad to say I just got back from a bowling tournament and decided to log in and do some websurfing. Blogger I love your blog. I had some very good laughs. I am doing a paper on wedding favors catalogs and have been downloading information for the last hour. I don’t know how I came across Now with pictures of boobs! but I am glad I did. It has set me back a little because I have spent the last hour reading your archives. If you don’t mind I would like to add you to my favorites so I can back again and read some more. Well I need to get back to wedding favors catalogs. I am almost finished with it. Great job.
p.s some very good points on your blog

10:56 PM, November 26, 2005  
Blogger mrtl said...

Oh Bucky, I'm so sorry the sisters weren't down with the piercings.

You are such an artist, but still I am thankful that your monkey hasn't been pierced and doesn't require illustrated stories.

p.s. I bought my first Homie yesterday. He shall stand on my desk in homage to you. (He's a teacher dude, standing at a pedestal.)

3:39 AM, November 27, 2005  
Blogger Jim said...

Poor Buckyboobs...I've printed your drawings and they are now posted in the Hotel Taverna in Budapest.

2:45 PM, November 27, 2005  
Blogger eclectic said...

Nice pin cushions! Although next time, you maybe should invest in the puncture-resistant ones.

Preventing deflate-a-boob, one voluptuous customer at a time.

4:23 PM, November 27, 2005  
Blogger JessicaRabbit said...

Dude, so wrong on so many levels. THis post makes my boobies scared and sad for your boobies. They have told me that they need to have a sit down chat with your boobies and explain how you should be treating them. Be careful, you have to be good to your boobies, or they can rise up against you. Trust me on this...

4:51 PM, November 27, 2005  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Boobies!

7:52 PM, November 27, 2005  
Blogger whfropera said...

so do you think we could get the wedding favors people to put nipple rings and barbells in festive paper cups on all the tables?
I'm just asking y'know... for a friend

9:03 PM, November 27, 2005  
Blogger Momentarily_Distracted said...

Um, who's getting married?
Not me, that's for certain.
The church roof would collaspe.

9:33 PM, November 27, 2005  
Blogger greatwhitebear said...

whfropera - how do I get invited to THAT wedding?

10:17 PM, November 27, 2005  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

You people realize you're only encouraging this kind of behavior in me, right?

11:35 PM, November 27, 2005  
Blogger Spikey1 said...

LOL, that was the bomb dude! **coughthankscough* :)

8:26 AM, November 28, 2005  
Blogger Von Krankipantzen said...

You know what they say about ladies who have huge hoots and loooong thin necks - they be CRAZY!

10:02 PM, November 28, 2005  

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