the Bucky Four-Eyes Cotillion

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Not quite Gumby


At sunrise, it dawned on me that I had been cheated out of the very hard-earned two dollars I spent on this unofficial Gumby outfit. As my eyes and genitals began to sting with more and more urgency, it occurred to me that packing one's person in wasabi is a piss-poor substitute for a Halloween costume.

Therefore, if anyone needs me in the next several hours, I will be scouring the last of the burning green goo from my body, probably with a full helping of whimpering and yelping, and then I will be shopping for a more suitable, and less painful, costume.

Note to self: Do not buy Halloween costume from vendor whose "shop" is the dumpster behind a Japanese restaurant.

14 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':

Blogger Candy said...

You got wasabi in your monkey? Not good. not good at all..

At least it doesnt smell like cat food

2:58 PM, October 23, 2005  
Blogger Squirl said...

I see this is in the Bucky's brain series. Did some of the wasabi leak in there, too? Ouch!

5:47 PM, October 23, 2005  
Blogger I'm not here. said...

:::stunned silence:::
The guy at the store said my costume was one of a kind.
I liked that dumpster.

Damn it.

7:37 PM, October 23, 2005  
Blogger Zombie_Flyboy said...

Scouring burning green goo from your body???

Hmmm. I haven't been anywhere near you this weekend Bucky.

So the question is this...

Is there another Zombie in the picture?

Because if there is, I'm prepared to enter into a bidding war for you, and it starts right now.


8:42 PM, October 23, 2005  
Blogger Candy said...

Three Fiddy.

And that god damn loch ness monster wont get a penny more.

8:48 PM, October 23, 2005  
Blogger Katy Barzedor said...

Jess - Yes, sort of burned that whole cat food thing right on outta there. Zowie!

Squirl - my brain is actually 49% wasabi. I can't divulge the rest of the recipe. Ancient chinese secret.

Emily - ok there, desert gal?

M_D - I think we've both been wronged. I think a discount is out of the question at this point, though.

Zombie - You know there could never be another zombie for me. It's just that I dipped into the barrel of industrial waste instead of the barrel of KY warming gel, and, well...ow ow ow owwwww!
But $4? Really? I've never felt so gosh darned valuable in my life.

Jess - hey, woman, why you fuckin' with my profit margins here? And let's leave the goddamned Loch Ness monster out of this.

8:55 PM, October 23, 2005  
Blogger Susie said...

You need a disclaimer on here warning people with nut allergies that this is a dangerous place.

10:15 PM, October 23, 2005  
Blogger eclectic said...

Wasabi Monkey -- found only on the island of Madagascar and often mistaken for a Lemur, the wasabi monkey is known for its bite, which stings and smells like wasabi. Hence the name.

10:49 PM, October 23, 2005  
Blogger Unknown said...

Wasabi… Monkey… Gumby… burning green goo… shop in a dumpster… Bucky, you have gone beyond blogging into pure lunacy! And that means that I feel very much at home here.

1:41 AM, October 24, 2005  
Blogger Opera Gal said...

Wasabi Monkey -- found only on the island of Madagascar and often mistaken for a Lemur, the wasabi monkey is known for its bite, which stings and smells like wasabi. Hence the name.
Insert visual of staid narrator, speaking the above in rapid-fire Japanese as the bad dubbing in English plays on a 2-second delay.
We need vKranki over here to ensure costume continuity on the goo...oh, wardrobe!!

7:01 AM, October 24, 2005  
Blogger Katy Barzedor said...

Susie - nut sad is that?
Oh, probably didn't mean...
Never mind.

Eclectic - thank you, professor LMAO. ;)

SS Nick - please do join us in the dumpster for tea and finger sandwiches.

Opera gal - I think we need your rim shot for this one, too!

8:03 AM, October 24, 2005  
Blogger Katy Barzedor said...

Squirl - maybe not as ancient as the Chinese diarrhea sculpture, but every bit as revered.

8:50 AM, October 24, 2005  
Blogger Annejelynn said...


2:09 PM, October 25, 2005  
Blogger illuminati said...

yeah looks like wasabi to me


10:27 PM, November 01, 2005  

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