You might, rabbit, you might
One of my pleasures in life, as I leave skidmarks on the road through middle age, is using age-inappropriate slang. Just by walking into a room and using words like shizzle and frontin', I make young people squirm in embarrassment, and leave my peers wondering if I'm:
a) serious
b) insane
c) going through mid-life crisis
d) getting better prescriptions than they are
I found out, though, that not all old folks avail themselves of the dregs of pop culture just for the fun of the shock value like some of us.
A few of us had gathered over at SA's place one afternoon, and were making plans for a group night out. SA hadn't slept much the night before, and she looked like she could nod off at any moment.
"I'm soooo damn tired," she said through a yawn. "I'm gonna have to put some teabags on my eyes."
My head snapped up and I caught the eye of TJ, who was sitting across from me. Did SA just say teabag? We both stifled a laugh, which SA must have seen, and she felt the need to explain.
"When I worked at the pet store," she continued, digging herself deeper, "we used to put teabags on the baby rabbits' eyes to get them to open."
TJ and I were completely incapable of containing ourselves by then, and we were both laughing so hard it's a miracle that no pants were pissed. SA was completely puzzled, as she hadn't meant the rabbit story to be funny. I kept trying to get enough breath to explain why that visual was so strikingly hilarious -- I mean, come on, the poor little teabagged bunnies! -- but it was five full minutes before I could breathe enough to speak coherently.
Thus did SA earn herself the coveted nickname of Teabag Tillie.
Don't you wish you had friends like me?
a) serious
b) insane
c) going through mid-life crisis
d) getting better prescriptions than they are
I found out, though, that not all old folks avail themselves of the dregs of pop culture just for the fun of the shock value like some of us.
A few of us had gathered over at SA's place one afternoon, and were making plans for a group night out. SA hadn't slept much the night before, and she looked like she could nod off at any moment.
"I'm soooo damn tired," she said through a yawn. "I'm gonna have to put some teabags on my eyes."
My head snapped up and I caught the eye of TJ, who was sitting across from me. Did SA just say teabag? We both stifled a laugh, which SA must have seen, and she felt the need to explain.
"When I worked at the pet store," she continued, digging herself deeper, "we used to put teabags on the baby rabbits' eyes to get them to open."
TJ and I were completely incapable of containing ourselves by then, and we were both laughing so hard it's a miracle that no pants were pissed. SA was completely puzzled, as she hadn't meant the rabbit story to be funny. I kept trying to get enough breath to explain why that visual was so strikingly hilarious -- I mean, come on, the poor little teabagged bunnies! -- but it was five full minutes before I could breathe enough to speak coherently.
Thus did SA earn herself the coveted nickname of Teabag Tillie.
Don't you wish you had friends like me?
Katy Barzedor proclaimed this to be so at 9:11 PM
9 of you felt the overwhelming need to say somethin':
PLEASE tell me you told her. hehe
Yeah, I finally got enough breath to explain. That was not what she was expecting to hear.
Later on, our cheeky little drummer Eric walked up to her, threw his hand up against his forehead, and proclaimed, "I'm pretty tired tonight. I'm gonna have to put some teabags on my face."
Yeah, she's still trying to find forgiveness in her heart. . .
Never underestimate the healing powers of the teabag....
Now it's time to box up and send her a couple of Kiwis. Anonymously of course.
You ' leave skidmarks on the road through middle age' and I just leave skidmarks on my underpants. And my bed. And my office chair.
Teabags on the face, especially the eyelids, really perks up the face and improves skin tone. I think it's the caffeine in the tea.
What?
Come over and check out my ass.
That is most excellent. Anyone who knows what it means to teabag and anyone who will use it to mock another is ok in my book, you can marry my son anytime!
Blogger comments are SLOOOOOOW today. They must be distracted by the teabagging they are getting.
I love my friends who are like that. The worst is being in a room full of serious people when someone says something like that, and you know that no one else gets it, and if you told them why you were laughing, they still wouldn't get it.
Girl.A, your ass is a sight to behold.
Roll call!
Mr. B -- OK, I'll bite: which way are you goin' with the kiwi? 'Cause there were a few delightful definitions in the urban dictionary. Enlighten an old bag!
LadyBug -- Sometimes a teabag can heal a rift like balm on a butt boil.
Girl.A -- I looked for the skidmarks in your pikcher, but all I saw was your wishin' well.
Nicksbitch -- Thank you for your blessing. Heh heh, this is almost as much fun as selling him to the gypsies, innit?
Ern -- Comments just came up like lightning for me (I know, the shock was profound), so maybe they took the teabags off.
when you get to be my age, it's best when you dip your teabag in a nice hot tub of water.
girl a......nice ass
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